5 Ways to Keep Your Illustrator from Hating You

So you just got some extra cash for your birthday and you've really really been looking forward to commissioning a professional illustration. It's time! But wait... I know, I know. You're not quite ready yet, because something has been weighing on your mind. Something very, very important:

"How do I keep my illustrator from hating me?"

How conscientious of you! What a great question. This is something you should be acutely aware of, as illustrators are poor, poor people and will often do things they hate so they can make money doing something they wished they loved. The best way to build a respectable and non-hateful relationship with your illustrator is to exercise common sense. I've broken down my Top 5 Illustration Peeves for your reference, and hopefully you can use this towards your next (joint) enterprise.

1. Pick an illustrator who does what you want. That is: If you want a Disney-style cartoon illustration, pick someone who has Disney-style work in their portfolio. If you want a funky abstract painting, pick an abstract painter. If you want something all Japanime with big googly eyes and enormous... tracts of land... pick someone who does that and have your proof of age ready. The thing that I hate almost the most is when I get a commission query from someone who wants me to draw something in a style that has nothing to do with what I draw. It would take anyone two seconds to page through my gallery to see I specialize in three things: Grunge/Victoriana/Steampunk, anime, and sexy girls. I don't do Nickelodeon, I don't do American cartoons, I don't do lifelike portraits, and I don't do goofy bucktoothed caricatures. Look through an illustrator's portfolio/gallery to make sure they do what you want before asking if they will do something else.

2. Respect your illustrator's pricing. Once you've picked an illustrator who kinda does what you want and has agreed to embark on this whole commissioning adventure, do not try to haggle pricing. If they charge hourly, that's what they're going to charge. If they charge a flat $300, that's what they charge. Don't tell the illustrator it's too expensive. You don't tell the waiter that your steak is too expensive (well, some people do -- and waiters hate those people!). You can tell them how much you're willing to spend, if you're afraid of hourly rates. But this does not guarantee they will go forward with the commission. I have heard time and time again that illustration rates are "way too high!" Well, illustrators don't just whip these things out of their asses. Yes, they do real work and spend real time on your illustration. I spend an average of 3-10 hours on every commission, and at some of the rates that have been proposed to me, it comes down to $5/hour. Yes really. Respect, people. Respect.

3. Be detailed. I may just be speaking for myself, but I would say the more detail, the better. As someone who does character illustration, I would really prefer you tell me everything you want in your character design plus any/every reference image you have. The alternative is finishing the commission and getting a novel back in response with all the things I missed or you missed. Give me details and I'll get it right the first time. If you didn't give me details on something, I'm going to assume you want me to use my own artistic opinion -- that's what you're hiring me for, after all!

4. STOP TWEAKING. When I get a back-and-forth of 10+ emails "tweaking" things after the piece has been completed -- "Make the cowl more green" "Make my hair more pointy" "Change the background to something completely different" -- I really start hating on my client. I know, I know, I shouldn't hate my clients. But there's nothing like spending as much time tweaking a finished product as I spent creating it in the first place. If you're so bent on not letting me do my artistic thing, then why don't you draw your own go**da*n picture? There, I said it: Draw your own g**da*n picture. If you can't relax and let your illustrator do things in their own artistic style (see #1), then you didn't hire the right illustrator and/or you should try drawing it yourself and see how far you get.

5. Do not photoshop the illustrator's signature/name off the image, don't reproduce without the illustrator's permission, don't alter the image unless you have written permission, don't resell the artwork unless it was in your contract. Etc, etc, etc. -- Duh. Just duh.